


Those Who Know

by Pappillon



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Fusion, Wholesome and GayTM, bellow diamond - Freeform, happy pride month!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:08:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24757537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pappillon/pseuds/Pappillon
Summary: Upon the dawn of Era 3, Yellow Diamond is confronted by her feelings.
Relationships: Blue Diamond/Yellow Diamond (Steven Universe)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 48





	Those Who Know

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I hope you enjoy this story. I hate to say it, but this will very likely be my last Bellow Diamond fanfic, simply because I think I've said everything I possibly can about this pairing, but I want to thank all of my readers for their continued support. It's been so fun writing for this fandom (which is not to say I'll never return! I'm also still planning on the Court of Ghosts sequel for anyone who's worried.) As always, I would love to hear your thoughts and I'll cherish your comments forever. <3 (And happy pride month!!)

On that day something had changed. 

In hindsight, it seemed perfectly normal. Yellow and Blue were sitting in the garden amongst all of the new plants, mostly flowers, which had been collected from other worlds. It was a community effort. Gems who still traveled to the far corners of the universe were encouraged to bring back anything beautiful with them, which resulted in a garden overflowing with sundry plants and no semblance of unity between them. Most exploded with petals in shades of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, violet—a competition for the frilliest gown with the most shapely seams. The chaos was encouraged. The garden could be anything. The gems could be anything, and Yellow and Blue sat amongst every color and cut of them, even some fusions. 

A comforting breeze picked up. Blue sighed and leaned back.

“It’s such a lovely day today.” 

Amongst all the flowers swaying gently, the gems were sighing, letting go. 

“I should probably get back soon,” Yellow said. “I left off when I was just about to put together a whole gem. I was just missing one piece...” 

“No,” Blue touched her hand. “Stay a little longer.”

It wasn't the first time Blue had touched Yellow’s hand, made her skin bumpy, but now she wove their fingers together. She had captured Yellow’s entire hand and left her no choice. 

Yellow sighed too. She forgot her responsibilities. “All right,” she said, “I'll stay.”

Blue continued holding her hand until the sun lazily changed positions.

* * * 

As soon as the next day, Yellow caught herself reaching for Blue’s hand during inappropriate times. They were at a meeting sitting next to each other, suggesting ways to better Homeworld.

“I think if we make a separate larger building I could go to, I could make even more clouds than what my room can hold, and I know that there are so many gems that could use my help…” 

Yellow almost went as far as touching Blue’s pinky. Her fingers had made contact, but as if receiving a shock, Yellow remembered it was a meeting and pulled them away.

White spoke. “Oh, that's a lovely idea, Blue. I know many gems still feel as though they are unwelcome into our rooms, so perhaps they might be more comfortable in a separate building.” 

“I can send out a poll about it,” Yellow added.

“Would you please? Now on to the next order of business…” White continued but Blue had reasserted herself over Yellow’s pinky, touching it with the tips of her careful fingers. Yellow’s face felt as though it had caught fire. She couldn't focus.

Whenever they were apart too long, Blue would come drifting back. Sometimes Yellow would hear her singing from the next room, making her hand unsteady as she worked with the tweezers. Blue blurred the hard edges of her room’s clean lines and made the air feel warm, though any newly resurrected gems didn't comment.

Alone, Yellow would still play music. Gems would create and upload songs she could access from her communication device—formerly forbidden dance beats about going out, finding someone, spending an evening together. Yellow patiently sorted the shattered gems’ pieces on beat. 

Most of them were vague enough to be about anything or anyone, so when they sang about dancing and dreams, it was easy to imagine taking Blue by the hand and leading her back to the garden. The electronic beats suggested neon colored plants against the black night sky. Maybe they would dance there too, or just sit, or lock their hands together and—

Yellow would stop there. She used to stop before even letting it go that far. Sometimes she might stop before even reaching the garden, before taking Blue by the arm. Yellow would remove herself from the music to stare from the window. The gems would come back apologizing, believing that they had upset her.

***

It kept getting worse. During walks, Blue would link their arms together and Yellow's head would swim. Her legs would threaten to collapse. Blue would laugh at her musically, then hold her tight to keep her from falling.

“I don't know what's gotten into me. I feel so overwhelmed.” 

Blue patted her shoulder. “Maybe it's the first time you're allowed to feel this way.” 

“Feel what way?” They stopped walking. “Don't tell me White's rules were the only thing keeping me together. You don't think I'm—gems don't fall ill, do they?”

“Hmmm…” Blue leaned in, trying not to smile. She pressed her hand to Yellow’s forehead. “You do feel awfully warm, but it could just be your lightning. I've also noticed that sometimes you have trouble paying attention. White has to repeat herself because it seems you’re somewhere else.” Blue took her hand away. "Where could that somewhere  _ be _ ? Is it always the same?” 

Yellow grew hot. Her feet had trouble staying connected to the ground. “Stars—it's happening again. This terrible feeling—what's going on with me?” 

“I don't know, but it seems very serious.” Blue was beginning to laugh.

“Don't giggle at me. You don't have any idea how unbearable this is.” 

“I'm sorry, Yellow. You're right. There's no  _ possible _ way I could know what you're feeling. I promise I'll try to be more sensitive next time.” Blue kissed her on the cheek and led her along by her wobbly legs.

***

Yellow didn’t leave her room for an entire day, the longest amount of time yet. As the time passed, she slumped over at her desk, listening to music released the day before. These were fast-paced, mostly about fusion. She had to remind herself that it was okay that they mention it.

Only some of the songs were truly good but Yellow listened to all of them, staring out the window. When someone knocked on her door, she only turned around when it opened. It was White.

“Yellow—” The sun had begun to set, but White lit up the purple room with her glow, a perfect night light. 

Even with a visitor, Yellow didn’t intend on moving. 

“What's wrong?” White said, taking a few steps into the room. “Blue and I haven't seen you all day.” 

Yellow turned back to the window. Stories below, gems were out for evening walks, linked at the elbows. She felt warm again. “I don't know,'' she said. “I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm so warm and dizzy all the time, and sometimes my chest tightens. I wonder if I'm corrupting...”

“ _ Corrupting _ ?” White came and, like Blue, pressed her hand against Yellow’s forehead. 

Where Yellow expected to swoon, she didn't. If anything, having White’s hand upon her head sobered her. 

“You are a little warmer than usual. I suppose it could be your lightning.” White sat at the edge of Yellow’s bench, balancing somehow on her long legs. “But your physical form seems fine. Could it be emotional?” 

Yellow burned into herself.

“If it is, maybe you should talk to Blue.” 

“ _ No _ . I can't talk to her.” 

“ _ You can’t?  _ But I thought you two talk all the time. Oh—” White’s face turned pink around the nose. “Oh, Yellow,” White touched her shoulder. “This is my fault, isn't it? Now that you two are finally free, I'm sure the emotions are overwhelming. I'm so sorry. Have you told her?”

“Told her what?”

“Come now. I won't be upset. You're more than welcome to talk about it.” 

“ _ Talk about what? _ ” 

“Yellow! You  _ really  _ don't need to upset me this way. I feel terribly enough for everything I put you both through!” White stood, wrapping her cape around herself dramatically. “Well, you have my blessing. Tell her, please. For my sake.” 

White fled, leaving Yellow to holler after her. “Wait! Tell her what?!  _ White! _ ” 

But she had already escaped, leaving a trail of sparkles behind her. 

Still, Yellow yelled. “Tell me what I should say to her, please!” 

White, however, did not return.

***

It was only a while later that Yellow found herself next to Blue at the site of the new Happiness Center, where a team of Bismuths had begun to build. They asked her to hold large objects in place, such as a pillar, around which they cemented. Yellow held a pillar too, watching as Blue lifted the Bismuths and set them down. 

She placed one upon the uppermost floor, at her waist. “I never knew how much fun it is to be an elevator. Yellow, why don't you try it? It looks like someone is waiting for you.” 

Yellow found another Bismuth at her feet, who gave a shy smile, setting her hand upon the back of her head. “If I could, My Diamond.” 

“You don't have to call me that anymore,” Yellow said, lifting her.

Blue was giggling again. “What a good elevator you make, Yellow. How efficient.” 

“You're acting like it's difficult.” But there was that feeling again. Blue’s gem magnified angles of sunlight overhead, glowing, making Yellow dizzier. 

“Well, I suppose it really isn't,” Blue said, “I just wanted to compliment you.” 

Yellow held the pillar a little tighter; she had to. She also looked away, toward the capital, whose new buildings were drenched in colors. They used to be organized in sections, strictly divided along arbitrary lines. Without the full consent of her brain, Yellow said, “You're so beautiful.” Then as soon as it came out, quiet as it was, she covered her mouth, turning to Blue, who was yet again trying not to laugh at her.

“Thank you, Yellow. You are too.” 

Yellow returned that evening a mess. Any composition unraveled, she sat at her desk, stared even harder out the window, head full of sappy electronic music as the night flowers opened. She caught them in the corners of her eyes—neon-fleshed and thirsty, because she couldn't observe anything else. There was just her breathing, which she never paid attention to before—painfully alive and full of sweet, floral air. She wanted to keep it, forever. She felt like crying.

The door opened on beat, but even if it hadn’t, Yellow wouldn't have seen the light. 

“I'm sorry to interrupt, but I wanted to check on you.”

Blue entered. The door locked out the hallway light as it closed, leaving only the deep purple and glow-in-the-dark flowers. Yellow hurried to turn off the music.

“You don't have to,” Blue said. “I like that song.” 

Yellow only turned it down, enough to hear Blue’s skirts rustle to the bench. She hesitated before sitting, but did, her legs pointed away from the desk so they could face each other.

The music thumped gently. “I wanted to tell you that I’m not upset about what you said today. You looked so nervous, but I like it when you share your thoughts.” 

“I didn’t want to insult you by saying something inappropriate.” Yellow couldn’t bear to look her in the eye. “Especially something so out of nowhere.” 

“Didn’t you hear me? I like your inappropriate, out-of-nowhere thoughts. We don’t have to keep such things to ourselves anymore.” Blue leaned in closer until closing the gap by embracing Yellow. “Aren’t you glad?” Her voice was low in her throat, her fingers trailing up the nape of Yellow’s neck. They could taste each other's shared breathing, Blue in, Yellow out. Out, in, scented of flowers.

“Blue—” 

There was something between them they both reached for. Just for a moment, their bodies turned to light, grasping, casting a glow against the neon plants and the star-filled window. Just for a moment, they were huge. Just for a moment, they were green.

Then they popped apart on the floor, Yellow and Blue again. 

The force of separating left Yellow lopsided on her bench, tilted with one side touching the floor, and Blue a short ways across the room. 

“I'm sorry—I didn't mean—” but she was already heading for the door.

“Wait—!” 

“I'm so sorry,” Blue said finally, and left Yellow with her photons buzzing back into place, and a snapshot of herself where Blue had stood. 

***

The next day, Yellow went to Earth. She didn't tell anyone she was going, nor Steven that she was coming. She simply arrived that evening, apologetically, in front of the beach house.

As Yellow stood there, waiting for someone to acknowledge her, her gem shined over the entire house, bright enough to signal a plane. Meanwhile, gems who used to be hers passed below, pausing as if to bow, but not many committed.

Finally, the door opened. Amethyst came out.

“Uh… Hey, Yellow Diamond.” 

Neither spoke.

“Do you need something or... You're just... Standing around?” 

Both fought the urge to cringe, sweating profusely.

“No. I'd like to talk to Steven.” 

“Umm. Sure. Hold on a second.” Inside the house, her voice could be heard calling, “Steven! Yellow Diamond is here to see you!” 

“What?" There were footsteps, nearing the door. "Did she say why?” 

“I don't know, dude. But I bet you're in  _ trouble _ —” 

The door opened again, and Steven shielded his face from Yellow’s rays. It occurred to her to cover her gem.

“Hey, what's going on?” 

Yellow explained as he walked her to the beach. She told him about her shortness of breath, her episodes of sighing at the windows while listening to dumb techno songs. She told him about her dizzy spells and how her mind always returned to—

“Blue?” Steven asked. He had taken his flip-flops off and dug his feet into the sand. “I don't know. It sounds like you're experiencing some emotions. Have you talked to her about them, or...?”

“It seems that she wanted to talk last night. She came to my room and well... We almost fused. In fact, I think we did.” 

“Hmm.” Steven lifted his feet from the sand, upsetting a crab from its burrow. “So you said you feel woozy around her, and you get tongue-tied, and you can't stop thinking  about her. And you feel like you can't tell her any of these things?” 

“That’s right.” 

“And no one else makes you feel this way?” 

Yellow glimpsed out to the ocean and the sky turning peach, orange, and purple. “Not even close.”

“Sounds like you might be in love.”

“ _ What? _ ” Yellow practically snapped her neck. “I can't be in love!  _ That's ridiculous _ . I've known Blue forever and—” Her eyes widened. “ _ Oh, stars _ .” 

Steven unstuck his feet and slipped them back into his shoes. “You came just around dinner time, so I'm going to go back in. I'd offer you a place, but…” Steven took a couple of steps, hands in his pockets, but turned back. Yellow was still having an existential crisis. 

“The same advice doesn't work for everyone, but... You should tell her. No matter what happens, it will probably make you feel better, getting it off your chest.” 

Yellow’s palpable dread seemed to dissipate. “Thank you, Steven.”

“You're welcome. Good luck.” 

The waves crashed as Steven left footprints back to the house. Yellow stayed put, boots in the sand as the tide rolled in. She focused on the color-gradient horizon, forgetting to blink.

***

Yellow stayed by the ocean, the waves crashing in and out punctuating the time. The moon rose high over the water, casting a silver shadow upon its surface. Along the beach, a few humans had set a bonfire, and just as it extinguished, Yellow’s communicator rang.

It was Blue.

“Hello?” 

“Yellow, where have you been? I checked in your room and you weren't there. And why do you have the video function turned off? Are you all right?”

“I'm fine.” The ocean crashed again. “I went to Earth, to clear my mind.” 

“ _ To Earth? _ Did you talk to Steven?” 

“Yes...how did you know?” 

“I had a feeling.” There was a short silence. “Do you mind if I join you?” 

Yellow froze for only a moment. “No, I don't mind.” 

“All right.” Blue set something down. “I'll be there soon.” 

It took a few minutes. Even though their ships were impossibly fast, it still wasn't instantaneous. Yellow, without realizing it, held her breath while searching the stars, waiting for Blue.

The ocean even seemed to slow, meeting the shore a little more gently, and in an eternity stretched over no time at all, Blue arrived. She parked her ship next to Yellow’s and joined her on the sand.

“It's good to see you again,” she said, sitting down. “Thank you for letting me join you.” 

Yellow, finally, took a breath. “Blue—” 

Blue held her hand.

“I love you.” 

There it was. Yellow had finally said those words. Her body caught fire internally, and Blue smiled. She squeezed Yellow’s fingers atop the sand.

“I know,” she said. “I was waiting so long for you to finally realize it.  _ Stars _ , I've never seen you swoon like that. You looked so cute.” Blue kissed her cheek, painfully close to her lips, and used their proximity to embrace her. “Do I have to tell you that I love you too? Or have you known?”

“I was hoping—” 

Blue kissed her, fully on the mouth. She held her a long time before letting her go.

“I'm sorry I fused with you. I mean—I'm not sorry that it happened, but the rules have been laid out for so long for what we weren’t supposed to do that now I'm not sure what you're comfortable with.” Blue kept her from falling. “You felt so overwhelmed. Even this seems like it might be too much.”

“No—” Yellow said. “I'm euphoric.”

“Euphoric? And I didn't even need to use my clouds.”

“Let me kiss you again.”

Blue smiled. “No. Come with me.” 

Yellow was a little slow to stand, legs stiff from staying in place for so long, but she followed as Blue pulled her into the ocean. The water was cool as it lapped against her kneecaps, more and more softly the further they went. They stopped about waist-deep, when Beach City appeared as a series of dim lights. The moon was bright overhead, and Blue took both of Yellow’s hands.

“Do you want to try fusing again?”

Yellow held hers firmly back. “I can try.”

“If this is ever too much–” Blue kissed both sets of her knuckles, “I want you to tell me. I want you to tell me everything. Promise you will.”

“I promise,” Yellow said, and kissed her on the cheek. “I love you, Blue.”

“I love you too, Yellow.” 

They embraced as the moon moved straight overhead, illuminating the greenish ocean water beneath them.


End file.
